Sunday, August 8, 2010

Nothing Else Matters

He was 12 years old. After a game of soccer, he went to his mate's place. His friend was a big music buff. He called me into his home, offered him a glass of TANG, switched on his home theater system and played this song -

After that day, he became a metal-head \m/

I am talking about myself.

But, that is not the point I am intending to make with this post. It is how this one song had an immense effect in my life. Everything that happened after that day, every single incidents, every triumph, every pitfall humbled him.

This song brought tears in my eyes. This song filled me with hope, when no one cared to listen to me. This song made me move on in life. This song cleansed my wounds. This song lifted my spirit. This song became my way of life.

Amazing, how a single song can change someone's life. It is fascinating how a song can motivate someone to such a huge extend.

I lost my youth at a young age. I wasn't expected to be around people 3-4years elder than me, but that is the circle that respected me. I became more mature than my age.

Is that good OR bad? I think it is a bit of both...

I learnt this theory a few years back. A less known fact is that I am a very good pencil sketch artist. Not any more though.

Any ways, during those days when I would draw, I'd check the resemblance of my portrait drawings by showing it to the kids who lived downstairs from me. A tiniest flaw would fail them from recognizing the celebrity I had taken hours to draw. I admired that!

Kids are so particular about details. They know when you are lying. Believe it OR not, they are pedantic. Why?

I would like to think because their selves are clean. They are not polluted by the extremities of this world. They are just being themselves. They love their parents, their siblings, their pet and their friends. There is no room for being cynical and judgemental.

They see and accept solid colors, and stay away from shades.

Children begin lives by loving their parents. When they grow old, they judge their parents. And, sometimes they forgive.

I can only claim that kids are selfishly business-minded. Hehe. Offer them a reward, and they will do what you want them to do. And, they can turn hesitant to share their box of candies. But, then, who doesn't? Everything is conditional.

With youth comes naivety. And, when you lose that, for an apparent reason, an expectation to not make errors dawns on us.

If one is made, we're constantly pushed for justifications. We're pushed and pushed until we have a reason.

Rationality begins to gain more relevance than emotions.

Sometimes, I develop this wishful thinking to go back in time and live those less lived years where I could commit a mistake without much baggage to face.

A twinkle of a tear in my eye, a cute sniff, a long face, a sincere line, "I am sorry", could make myself excused and resolve everything; well, at least in my aspect!

Now, when you are old, you are expected to be mature, and if you commit a mistake now, it is like being in court marshal. Regardless of whom you are communicating with, you are constantly tip-toeing amidst egg-shells.

The result of which is a compromise on sincerity. Now, we do not want to hurt anyone's feelings, do we?

With that child like innocence came outright honesty.

With maturity came the probability to over think and over complicate matters.

Combine maturity with a couple of life-changing experiences, and you have a person who can either be optimist, realist OR a pessimist. But, children are just plain neutral.

Today, we are all bothered about our reputation. This is one thing that kids carry as well.

I reckon you should let your kids overhear you complementing them and their goodness with your pals. See their face glow! Make their day!

We often misunderstand that kids seek materialistic pleasure. I don't think so. Yes, for sure, bribe them with a toy and they will keep their bunker spotless.

But, it is your presence and not your presents that will last as a cherished memory through which they will miss you, and love you.

We need to shower our love, care, respect and support to them by listening to them and encouraging them to share their thoughts rather than subjecting them to fear and forcing them to keep mum.

How many homes have been shook bad when an inappropriate incident has come to light many years after it had actually happened? Straight-forwardness is always good. Even if it is unattainable, do not compromise on honesty. Talk to your dearest one.

Honesty may break a relationship. Honesty may hurt someone's feelings. Honesty may have numerous impacts which are ideally categorized as being "bad impacts". But, really, are they bad?

I don't think they are. You utter the truth, you may hurt someone. But, that someone will look back at the incident and thank you. I claim this with my own experience.

I abide by the track of honesty. I run across stations that bring in varying situations. Some simple. Some complicated. Some hurtful. Some benign. I whiz through different terrains and different weather conditions, but I always stay true on the track of
honesty. I bear an open mind, yet, my destination does not drift away from honesty.

This is the reason I love this song. It reemphasizes how no matter what, you stick to your ethics, you do the right thing and do not fear the repercussions. Mind you, this is easier said than done.

Ultimately. self-satisfaction and self-esteem is what we die with. Work on keeping it rather than satisfying anyone else.

"Nothing else matters!"

Photo by Ajey Padival

Copyright © Ajey Padival 2009-2010 (Brisbane, Australia; +61434360675;

19 responses:

Anonymous said...

Ty AJ.. You are speaking from your heart,and trusting in yourself and who you are. as you said nothing else matters.. love this song as well. This heart opening is helping me.. TY

BTW I thought in your last post "waking up" the friend you mentioned , my first thought was a special someone I have in blog world.. I went back & I was right.. YEAH!!

TC HUGS and TY keep writing:}

Strawberry Girl said...

TY Ajey and TY Inky... You're both true friends.

You're right, "Nothing Else Matters," as long as you're true to yourself.

Sometimes I regret not following after drawing and art... and wish that I could just grasp a hold of those dreams, along with writing of course, to develop and pursue them... at the present moment though, what matters is earning enough money to support my little family. You're still a good artist Ajey... Ex. Your blog header ;)

I get overwhelmed sometimes, thus the desertion of the blogging community for a time... sometimes, if I'm overwhelmed, I can't handle very many things at once.

Plus the question always looms, "How do I stay true to myself if I haven't let myself develop..." thus I'm letting myself develop.

TY both (again) for being such good friends...

Real Me said...

@Inky - Yea! hehe! Thanks, you!

Real Me said...

@Strawberry Girl - Time is a constraint. I understand. But, simply write, as you said, it does not matter if anyone reads it OR not.

You liked the header? :)


Rainbow dreams said...

so true, so honest - I have always trodden the honest route because others just get too complicated.. have been told I am too honest at times..but everyone knows where they stand...
I hope my kids will forgive me anything they need to - there are no rules to follow, no equations that guarantee success so life is always a gamble! Thank you for sharing a part of you here, xx

SandyCarlson said...

I agree with you. In the end, we are alone with our own choices and the actions that grew from them. Understanding that comes with time and age.

James said...

It took 45 years to get from learning how to play the guitar to discovering my inner composer. And it was exactly the right amount of time.

Your writing in this post kicks metaphysical ass down the street.

("Dimensions" might sound good in the upper right hand player. Wink.)

The Write Girl said...

AJ, I enjoyed this piece. It is amazing what one song can do and songs can be healing. For me, I've always considered a quote or passage to be transformative. I enjoyed your thoughts on this. Have a great week.

Eva said...

It is so important to be true to oneself. Amazing how songs can shape our lives like that.

Shadow said...

there is a certain wisdom in the simplicity of a child's thinking. one that we should never lose.

Shadow said...

p.s. and i hope this is the reason my son loves this song too. and metallica!

Real Me said...

@Rainbow Dreams - Thanks!!!

Real Me said...

@Sandy - True. Thanks, you!

Real Me said...

@James - Hmm, I see your point.

Real Me said...

@The Write Girl - Yes, it is amazing. Thanks!

Real Me said...

@Eva - True!

Real Me said...

@Shadow - I love Metallica! Yes, you are right! Thanks!

findingmywingsinlife said...

I too have always liked this song and readily agree that one should never compromise themselves in order to placate another.

I have never really ever concerned myself with what others thought about me. I have a tendency to tell it exactly like it is to fact I've been told that my honesty hurts sometimes. But the same few who brave it enough to tell me that, are also the ones who've said they appreciate me all the more for it.

Besides, I've often found that honesty is the key to everything...few people realize that though.

Opaque said...

@Findingmywingsinlife - Exactly! Thanks!!