Monday, June 8, 2009

Under the drowning sun


(Keyboard Solo)

Standing alone
On the outside
Looking into the
Home that was burning
My childish dreams were shattering
I lost his pride
And, I stood with no understanding
Happiness and fate collide
And, I stood there wondering

That this world is a two-faced animal
Whom do I trust now?
I see my branches twist and play

(Drum Fill)
(Strings begin)

Under the black moon and flaming guns
Under the helpless drowning sun
Arising danger, but I fear none
The ring shall come no near
It’s me, it fears
Drink all the poison and breath in
My emptiness fills within
And, my heart shatters from sin

(Strings end)
(Drum Fill)
(Guitar Solo)
(Instrumentals - 1 minute)

Standing alone
On the outside
Walking into the
Home that is burning
My childish dreams are shattering
No! I cannot lose his pride
And, I’ll stand up to give up what I have
Happiness shall prevail
And, I shall stand defending

That this world is a two-faced animal
I shall trust no one but me
I’ll cut my branches that twist and play

(Drum Fill)
(Guitar Solo)
(Drum Fill)
(Strings begin)

Under the black moon
Under the flaming guns
Under the drowning sun
Arising fear, but I have none
The ring shall come no near
It’s me! It fears
Empty the poison
And, breathe in
My emptiness
Fills within
And, my heart
Shatters from sin


Copyright © Ajey Padival 2008 (Brisbane, Australia; +61-434360675; ajeypadival@msn.com)

Image by Totalzombie

70 responses:

Poetikat said...

Ajay - This is definitely a favourite for me - I like the story you're telling, the images are vivid. I just wish I could hear it!

(The photo is great too.)

Kat

Brosreview said...

@Poetikat - Thanks!!! I'm glad you figured it out.

Rikkij said...

AJ-I think this is of your best work. A real weaving of thoughts in perfect sync. I wouldn't change a thing! ~rick

Brosreview said...

@Rikkij - Ah, thanks mate!!! It means a lot to me.

Maverick said...

This one's more intense and a bit toned down compared to ur oder works. Nevertheless, the feel is excellently conveyed. Loved dis one! :)

Brosreview said...

@Maverick - Thanks!!! Yes, I toned it down in this one.

findingmywingsinlife said...

I'm liking this one as well. Very interesting. Your very good with putting these songs of yours together..they are my favorite kind- songs with lyrics that have meaning behind them.

The Write Girl said...

What a powerful and emotional piece. I love your title and these words conveyed such lovely imagery
"Under the black moon and flaming guns...Under the helpless drowning sun"

Nicely done!!

Brosreview said...

@findingmywingsinlife - Thanks, you! I am glad you like it.

Brosreview said...

@The Write Girl - Thank you!!!

Viji said...

AJ lovely :)

Imagine "I lost his pride" ... i would call this the second best.. the first one is "Destiny"

The last stanza is awsome..

Brosreview said...

@Viji - Thank you!!! So, you've read "Destiny", eh? I'm glad to know you liked it.

Viji said...

I have read all your songs and commented everyone of them I guess :) but "Destiny" is something.. I doubt if you can equal that ever, even if you do I will still be partial to it..

Brosreview said...

@Viji - Thanks Viji! You've made my day! Really, you have! Thanks for that!

Jenny said...

Ajay,

These lines are incredible:

"Under the black moon and flaming guns
Under the helpless drowning sun
Arising danger, but I fear none"

The heavy flaming imagery, wow! "Under the drowning sun" is such a great title as well.

/Jenny

Brosreview said...

@Jenny - Thank you so much!

Ms.R. said...

Under the black moon and flaming guns
Under the helpless drowning sun
These line are my fav. Creativity :D Loved it

Brosreview said...

@Ms.R - Thank you!!!

Diya said...

Everything here is flawless, I am awestruck! This is perhaps one of the best I have read, wonderful.

Brosreview said...

@Diya - Thank you!!!

Shadow said...

i shall trust no-one but me... i like that, and although it's far from the ideal, sometimes it's essential!

Brosreview said...

@Shadow - Thank you!!! And, yes, I agree with you.

inky said...

That this world is a two-faced animal
I shall trust no one but me
I’ll cut my branches that twist and play

Such strong words with deep meanings. you know, it hit home.. I love love love this ONE. Gosh I have so many faves of yours now.

I will remember these words I'' cut my branches that twist and play..
Again you made me DANCE!!!

Pretty Me!! said...

Drink all the poison and breath in
My emptiness fills within
And, my heart shatters from sin


very strong lines !! brilliant lyrics :)

Alexandra Garland said...

Sometimes it feels like the world is coming down on us… Those are the moments we need to look within and trust ourselves the most. Great write Ajay!!
-Alex

SarahA said...

It's funny AJ sometimes I can 'hear' you. Really 'hear' your words drumming a beat in my thoughts and at other times; nowt.
With this here words, I can 'hear' and because of such I am liking more.But doesn't that say something? When someone who physically can not hear, hears such within.
Ok enough waffling....I really just wanted to say....good one, you!

Brosreview said...

@inky - Ah, thank you so much!

Brosreview said...

@Pretty Me!! - Thanks!!!

Brosreview said...

@Alexandra - Well put Alex! Thank you!!!

Brosreview said...

@SarahA - That is huge SarahA! Thank you!!!

Catvibe said...

Well here I finally am. You've been such a dedicated responder to my poetry and I've been a total ass about getting here and commenting. Not that I haven't been by, I have many times, but for some reason I haven't been by when you've posted poems (songs) and finally I have made it when you did. I should be flogged, consider me completely flogged. I've been a bad girl, I hope you'll forgive me. I have to say, I love your choice of music on your blog, being a classical artist myself and loving the way what you have chosen washes over me. I love these lyrics and so wish I could just hear the music that accompanies it. This world is a two faced animal... You have some incredible images going on here and I love it.

Brosreview said...

@Catvibe - Thanks for visiting my spot. Nah! I understand. I reckon you must have been too busy to be here. Here, I release song(s) every week.

Thanks for reading and appreciating!

ljgalletaenglishpoems said...

Hi Ajey :-)

Am very thankful for your visit in my blog- because of it, I also had the privilege of knowing about your wonderful works! Your art is exceptional.

These lyrics are great- in substance, most especially. It would be great to hear the song! :-)

More power,
Leofina Jane

Brosreview said...

@Leoffina - Thank you so much!

Zendagi Migzara said...

Hmmm.... A connect of the inside and outside world.. more like a fight within oneself... The imagery here is lovely yet painful...

Keep them coming...

Brosreview said...

@Zendagi - Thank you!!!

Satans Darling™ said...

Standing Ovation!

Great work.. I am speechless.. This is just perfectly conveyed :)

Brosreview said...

@Satans Darling - Thank you!!!

thoughts said...

its absolutely fantastic. loved the optimist shining out bright.

Strawberry Girl said...

Oh bravo!! I love it Bros. :D

Music and pen... inspiring together. I am working on a story inspired by Kenny Loggins song "I'm Free" "Heaven helps the man who fights his fear, loves the only thing that keeps me here. "I'm Free!" You're the reason that I'm hangin on. My hearts staying where my heart belongs. "I'm Free!"

There are guitar rifes, drums and an electronically generated sound throughout.

Haven't worked on my story for a while though...

(Plus, though I am inspired by music, it would be hard for me to add musical details like you do... though I haven't tried. Hmmmm.)

Question, how much of your work is recorded with the music?

Strawberry Girl said...

Hmmm. alrighty looking around your blog, I gather that these songs have been recorded, fantastic!! I too would like to hear them. ;p :D

Brosreview said...

@thoughts - Thank you!!!

Brosreview said...

@Strawberry Girl - Thank you so much! Well, only a few are been recorded now.

Brosreview said...

@Strawberry Girl - Not all of them are recorded. A few are in the process. Once done, I shall share a link here.

zorlone said...

Heavy metal with a touch of poetry Ajey!

Lemme see, a man on top of the mountains with fast forward scenes of day and night. The sun soars and sets, then the moon rises and fades away. Close up of the man with inner turmoil seen in his face.

My take on the MTV of this song.

Z

Brosreview said...

@zolrone - Ah! That is a nice idea Z! Thanks for that! And, yes, thanks for reading my song too.

Preetilata【ツ】 said...

now i am in lost of words. wish i cud hear it. :)

p.s... net problem so not regular thz days plus busy with colg works. sorry.

Brosreview said...

@Preetilata - Thanks, you. Nah, I understand people being busy with their daily rituals. I too am busy with many things in hand. Good luck!

Rebekah Cadman said...

I totally agree with 'Poetikat'. I would love to hear it. I think it really takes you on a journey and is so beautifully written. Keep it up - I love reading your stuff.

Meena said...

This is different. It's depressing, but not twisted like that other album you have.

Is this a new album you started recently?

Brosreview said...

@Rebekah - Thanks, you! Yes, I'll most certainly put up a link once the song is recorded.

Brosreview said...

@Meena - Ah! Thanks for coming. Umm, yes, I am working on multiple albums now. I haven't finished the "twisted" album THE yet. There are two more songs to come for the same album. Well, you can check the label below each song that indicates the album title. If you click on it, all the songs that fall under the album will be displayed.

Robin said...

Such a powerful and emotional piece. Deeply moving. And I love the title!

Brosreview said...

@Robin - Thanks mate!

Khaled KEM said...

Hi Ajey,

Another epic song. I could not say more than everyone commented here bros. I know that one day you will produce your own album. Keep writing and writing.

Brosreview said...

@Khaled - Inshallah!!! Thanks a lot!

J said...

Mate, you demand superior musicianship here for this song. Highly demanding frontal and central section. The end seems more forgiving as the structure is clean.

Good words and felt the depth of it. The contrast is amazing. The branches analogy is well done.

Good job! Good luck!

Brosreview said...

@J - Thanks, man! I thought so too about the musical elements. I tried trimming it down but I think this is how it has got to go.

Walker said...

This is great especially this part

"Under the black moon
Under the flaming guns
Under the drowning sun
Arising fear, but I have none
The ring shall come no near
It’s me! It fears"

I can relate to some of this

Brosreview said...

@Walker - Thanks mate!!!

Quackster said...

I feel darkly vibrant with an pinch of melancholy. Quite fine buddy! Thanks for dropping by by the way =)

Brosreview said...

@Quackster - Thanks, man!

Cynthia said...

Wow. BrosR. you blew me away with
this song. Beautifully heartbreaking, brings to mind a
young child in a war-torn country.


BR. I having a challenge at
Epiphany, please join in!

Brosreview said...

@Cynthia - Thank you!!!

riddhi said...

ok i read this one in office and thought i already left my words..
to see your childhood dreams fall in front of you is heartening..
I loved the expression "Happiness and fate collide"
It is like being at that juncture in life when things just happen by themselves. You cant help it. Being at the nucleus of the turmoil, at the same time being a silent spectator to it is frustrating.. living at the margins..
It can be tough..is tough.. ok As I always say, i am poetically illiterate. It is what i make of it.. even if this is not at all what u wanted to convey... I will like it anyway :)

Brosreview said...

@riddhi - It is a fair interpretation Riddhi. Thanks! I am glad you liked it.

Make Me Disappear said...

Definitely a favorite of mine from now on!

Absolutely love it!

Art-work compliments the theme brilliantly.

Sorry again, for coming so late!

Hope you'll understand brother! Life's certainly not easy these days :)

Brosreview said...

@Make Me Disappear - Ah! Thanks mate!!!

Saadi said...

Is it on the loss of innocence in childhood?!

Or something related to children....the questions they possess about the world or something along those lines?!

That's my guess!! Nehow, it's somewhat different from ur other stuff...but it is good, no doubt!

Brosreview said...

@Saadi - Thanks, man!